I'll get this out of the way right now. The Bunny Perspective stars Phil, a "foul mouthed, pot smoking puppet bunny". I can hear you now. "But Stu, this has nothing to do with vidya gamez?!?" I know, but it's my thing and I'll showcase who I want, so sit and watch anyway. Enlighten yourselves. If you want your video games, Phil gets equated to Max from Sam & Max quite often and really there is a resemblance. He'd be like Max's cooler, more composed and "with it" cousin. But that's where the similarities end.

Generally Phil (and by proxy his writer, creator and ego to Phil's id Mike Bennett) does positive reviews, pretty fairly at that. This may seem like an odd thing to point out but a lot of reviewers go for the negative or universally known sucky because those tend to get more hits and have more inherent humor attached to them. However, when a review actually makes me seek out something and find something really cool, that is far more enlightening and benefitial. Perfect example is The Good, The Bad, and The Weird. I had seen the title on Netflix, was intreaged, put it on my instant queue, but never pulled the trigger on watching it. Then I took an arr....no. Nonono. Bad Stu. Anyway, then I saw Phil's review of the same title and knew I had to watch it.

And yes, it's just as good as Phil puts it out to be. Phil also tends to put things together in theme months, which is helpful in some regards in to what the schedule my look like and what's on the docket. For Halloween, though, he took on a negative, something so horrifying and terrible that I give him his props for sitting through it: The Rocky Horror Glee episode. *shudder*

I can hear the raging now. You want your video games. Fine. FINE. You want it. It just so happens that Phil, along with Kyle "Oancitzen" Kallgren (who does the also absolutely amazing Brows Held High, a show that I am still pondering how exactly to showcase here) and Ven (Kyle's title card artist) Let's Playing probably the most epic procedural RPG of our time. Of course, the full Let's Play is too long to put here, so I'll add the Best of:

What? It's The Room RPG. What did you think I mean when I said "most epic procedural RPG of our time"?

The Bunny Perspective can primarily be found on the main web site. Along with multiple other shows, live stream, art and ponies. If you're into that kind of thing. You can also check out his most entertaining Twitter as well. See. Isn't it nice to break out of the norm every once and a while? You mooches.

For just over a week now, I've been posting a retro TV intro/theme song video on twitter every day, because... nostalgia. Seriously who doesn't love a good, hard slap in the face of the good ol' days, looking back and remembering the sweet theme songs from the 80s and 90s? I totally just sounded like a TIME-LIFE infomercial right there. So I figured, why not do a weekly (or bi-weekly) (or whenever I feel like it) 'Time-Travel Tuesday', where I post a collection of all the theme songs I've posted on Twitter throughout the week. Sounds like a plan, right? Right! LET'S DO THIS!

TURBO TEEN

DINOSAUCERS

JEM

FRAGGLE ROCK

COUNT DUCKULA

YOU CAN'T DO THAT ON TELEVISION

POUND PUPPIES

SHIRT TALES

HONG KONG PHOOEY

YOGI'S TREASURE HUNT

BONUS VIDEO

THE ADVENTURES OF PETE AND PETE

Yesterday, to distract from that awful "real life", I started a hashtag exploring gamified TV shows: #GamerTV

Instead of being a couple of jokes, it wound up spanning seven hours (in the background of my real work) and I was notified multiple times about hitting my daily limit? Which I guess is a thing that happens on twitter? Anyway, here's the complete list, for your enjoyment. And at the end, I've included some highlights from friends that joined in. Please add your own in the comments below.

For future time-line jamming nonsense, please follow @brockwilbur.

My So Called Extra Life

Portalandia

Happy Days Of The Tentacle

Heavy Rainbow Brite

Crackdownton Abbey

The Colblip Report

X-COMmunity

According To Earthworm Jim

Once Upon An Ocarina Of Time

Scrubs The Zombie

How I Metroid Your Mother

That's So Riven

Dawson's Creed

The Secret of Monk Island

Eternal Darkwing: Launchpad's Requiem

Men Of A Certain Rampage

Left 24 Dead

The Braidy Bunch

Starfox & Hutch

Caroline in the Vice City

Bleszinski's Anatomy

LAN & Order

Alphas Protocol

Justified Cause

Desperate NPCs

2 Brothers, A Princess, and a Pizza Place

Pwn Stars

CASTLEvania

One Tree Silent Hil

Veronica's Monster Closet

Weeds vs Zombies

Sex in the SimCity

Battlestar Galaga

Deadwood Rising

The Venture Brothers In Arms

Borderlands of the Lost

Friday Night Torchlights

Alone In The Darkwing Duck

The Collectible Finder

24: 64

American Left 4 Dad

Parasite Even Stevens

Commish & Conquer

The Oregon Trailer Park Boys

Breaking Bad Company

Tyler Perry's Meet The Black Ops

Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grenadier?

Studio 360 On The Sunset Strip

Madden Men

Pilot Wings

Duck Hunt Tales

Bulletstorm Chasers

FullThrottle House

Ren & Stimpak

Achievement Idol

Homefront Improvement

Mario Party Down

Celebrity Respawn

The Secret Half-Life Of The American Teenager

Wife Palette Swap

PSYCHonauts

LittleBigRascals

The Dukes Of Nukem

Dead Spaced

Dead Space Ghost: Coast To Coast

Good Day LA Noire

Everybody Loves Rayman

TwinBee Peaks

Survivor Mode

Danny Phantom Hourglass

New Girl +

Everybody Hates Chris Rock Band

Cougar-strike

Ultima Fighter

Peggle Rock

American McGee's Got Talent

Leisure Suit Louie

Teenage Mutant Ninja Battletoads

Growing Painkiller

Smash TV

The Voice Command

Dizzy The Explorer

Final Fantasy Island

Shadowgate SG-1

World's Most BioShocking Police Chases

Sabrina, The Teenage Witcher

Splatterhouse on the Prairie

Jak and Dexter

Guitar Heroes

The West Wing Commander

DoubleFine Dare

Legends of the Hidden Templar

Jon & Syndicate Plus 8

The Dead Island

Deus Exstreme Makeover

Twisted Metalocalpyse

Veronica Martian Bear

Double Dragonball Z

Antiques Road Rash

Belmont The Vampire Slayer

Terra Nova Prospekt

Serious Samurai Jack

Teen Wolfenstein

Yo! DLC Raps

House MD of the Dead

MinecrAfter Mash

The Sims-sons

Theme Parker Lewis Can't Lose

Beyond Good & Whitney

Red Dead & Recreation

Digger Van Dyke

Nick Cannon Presents Wild 'N Fallout

Spin SimCity

F3AR Factor

Crazy TAXI

Tru Calling of Duty

Switched At Spawn

Catherine Explains It All

Are You Afraid Of The Darkness?

Castle Crash

Neverwinter Night Live

Insanely Twisted Shadow Planet Earth

Legend of the Zelda Seeker

Wheel Of Fortune City

Destroy Build Destroy All Humans

Maniac Cribs

Tabula Rasa's Salon Takeover

Arkham's Next Top Model

Hoardemoders

Splinter Cell This House

The Fresh Prince of Persia #GamerTV
(Thanks to Nick @LabyrinthX for cleaning this one)

No Ordinary Fatality

Eek! The Katamari

Brutal Legends of the Hidden Temple

Corpse Party of Five

Savepoint By The Bell

Cybilization

The Amnesia Race

NeverDead Like Me

Last Call with Carcassonne Daly

Bubble Bobbles' Burgers

Survivormanhunt

Lode Running Wilde

Diner M*A*S*H

Suda 54, Where Are You?

Kung-Fu Panzer

Dark Shadows Of The Colossus

Family Gaiden

Scott Pilgrimm

Silk S.T.A.L.K.E.R.

Mike Tyson's Punch-Outsourced

God of War at Home

Breakout Kings Quest

Sam & Max Headroom

LimBones

Singularity'd Out

RuPaul's ModNation Race

The State of Emergency

Sins of a Stella Empire

Joey Danger

Words with Friends

King of the Silent Hill

Jedi Knight Rider

Bomberman vs. Wild

Spin City Ransom

Super Jonas Brothers

Silent Hill 90210

That's So Ravenholm

Bewitchered

Bit.Tripping The Rift

How the Grinch Stole Christmass Effect

Seinfelder Scrolls

Reading Rainbow Six

And now, a few awesome inclusions from friends, all of whom worked on our videogame film Your Friends Close:

@FastDanger - Rob Ondarza

Full House of the Dead

Animaniacs Mansion

Gabriel Knight Court

Grimm Fandango

Conker's Bad Fur Days of Our Lives

Dance Dance Moms

Top Gears of War

General Theme Hospital

American Choplifter

Knots Skylanders

American Horde Story (the 3do title)

Charlie's Blazing Angels

Callofdutycation

Q*bert as Folk

Boy Meets World of Warcraft

30 Rock of Ages

Eat Street Fighter (IV 3D Edition)

Cel Damages

2 Angry Birds

Jet Grind News Radio

Tony Hawk's Six Feet Underground

Sports Night Trap

Duck Tales of Vesperia

Dark Shadows of the Damned

Perfect Stranger's Wrath

The Facts of Half-life

Alleyway McBeal

Ratchet and Clank: Futurama

Super Mario Land of the Lost

Super Mario Galaxy Quest

No More Heroes 2: Desperate Housewives

The Killing Time

Are You Afraid of the Dark Souls?  ( BTW, the answer is YES.)

Dark Soul Train

Band of Brothers in Arms

Temple Runway

Dick Clark's New Year's Parasite Eve

Theme Parks and Rec

Remington Steel Batallion

Scarecrow and Mrs. King's Quest

Then, Dana LaRue - @BrokeAssBride:

So You Think You Can Dance Dance Revolution

The Comeback Kid Icarus

Bob's Burger Time

A Gifted Pac Man

Pitfalling Skies

Q*bert and Ernie

Static Bioshock

Monkees Island

Call of Duty: Black Books

The Deus Ex List

Legends of Zork and Mindy

Bluer Than Indigo Prophecy

Code Red Dead Redemption

Urban Legends of Zelda

Pie in the Skyrim

Finally, Jason Spitz - @JasonSpitz

Dig Doug

Double Dragon Dare

God of Storage Wars

Marvel Versus Man Versus Food Versus Capcom

Space Invader Zim

Madden 20/2012

Grand Theft Auto 3 2 1 Contact

Lemmings (also known as Fox News)

Originally suggested/promoted by DJ Cutman on his Twitter feed, I've been so hooked onto Scattle's work, especially this track. I want a NES cart wearing shades! So listen and support the man. He's both a chiptune artist AND an indie game developer. What more do you want? Well if you DO want more, you greedy greedy people, either click the link up there in the player or go to his Bandcamp page here.

This is just soooo wrong, making fun of Canada like that. We all know Canadians have Mounties, not a CSI.

This week has been awesome, cuz it finally snowed, and not crappy snow, but the good kind you can make snowmen with. I made a tiny snowman in front of the movie theater last night. When I perfect my skills, I'll be making snowman works of art such as this. Welp... there's not much to talk about, so let's just jump into this thing.

We all know Whitney Houston passed away recently, and in Save Point fashion, I've found the best tribute ever made. Vegeta's tribute. [youtube]

What would you say if I told you that Link and Samus action figures will soon be released, with two versions of Samus, both with and without armor? What if I said, the Armored Samus action figure would be fully poseable, like seriously poseable for all your action-packed posing needs. *pew* *pew* *pew* [geekologie]

Speaking of "*pew* *pew* *pew*", what do you get when you shoot a large acrylic slab with a particle accelerator? Freakin' amazing fractal art, that's what! I'll take two, thanks. [geekosystem]

Normally you wouldn't think it dangerous to light a firecracker and drop it down a sewer manhole. Well guess what... Looks like this dude thought the same thing. Boy was he wrong. Hey, two little kids next to him, you might want to run away before you get crushed. What has this video taught us? Don't throw firecrackers in the Ninja Turtles home. Their booby traps will MESS YOU UP! [youtube]

TMNT 1 and 2 were awesome movies. TMNT 3, well... meh. Maybe we can rectify TMNT 3 with a TMNT live-action reboot? What do you think? Turns out Jonathan Liebesman, the guy who directed Battle L.A., is in negotiations to direct a new one. I LOVE me some live-action Ninja Turtles. If this goes though, he better not screw it up, that's all I'm sayin'. [gammasquad]

Another franchise in the works of becoming a live action movie is Twisted Metal, to be written and directed by Brian Taylor. This was one of my favorite games to play on the PlayStation. Over time it has developed an in depth and dark storyline for each of the characters. This has the potential to become a seriously amazing movie if Brian does it right. [geekosystem]

We have 3 years until 2015. That's the year when hoverboards are suppose to be made and already widely circulated. Mattel will soon be releasing Hoverboard replicas. Sadly it's only a replica of Marty's hoverboard, and as it clearly states on the packaging, it does not work on water. Looks like I'll have to wait a few years to get a Pitbull, because it's got POWAH!! [geekologie]

Whether you love or hate the fact that Star Wars is coming out in 3D, the fact is, that it's happening, and there's nothing you can do about it. George Lucas will keep finding ways to re-release the Star Wars movies, and he'll keep finding little things to change about it. Even if you hate this, is it really all that bad? Here's 4 things you need to accept about George Lucas. [cracked]

Are you only familiar with 3 or 4 Darths in the Star Wars universe? Educate yourself, with a list of ALL THE DARTHS!! in all of the Star Wars. (darth maul will always be my favorite darth. come at me bro) [ugo]

What if Star Wars actually took place within Feudal Japan? What would the characters look like? Let's find out, shall we? [howtogeek]

I'll finish up this Round-Up by destroying small bits of your childhood. Or at least show you things about it that you never realized. [buzzfeed]

GAME BONUS: Do you love Shadow of the Colossus? How about a simplified, yet still nearly as fun flash game with the same gameplay style? I present to you, Heir. [armorgames]

I don't do well with empathy.

I found Punishment Park an upsetting viewing experience for many reasons, not the least of which being its ability to force an emotional connection between myself and hippie culture. For a man with Cartmanian opinions on the movement, this was nothing short of a triumph in filmmaking. Longhairs and Commies, spouting free-love rhetoric and getting bashed over the head with nightsticks? "Comedy gold!" thought I. Two hours of man-weeping later, I feared Brock Wilbur might be broken.

Today is about correcting this discomfort, by diving into a film which celebrates my nightmare scenario: yippe take-over. Apocalyptic stakes indeed. Let's set the world right.

Gas! or Gas-s-s-s! or It Became Necessary to Destroy the World in Order to Save It was a 1971 film, and schlock-master Roger Corman's last directing credit for eighteen years. My love of Corman knows no bounds, so I revel in this excuse to watch him rip off Wild in the Streets, which was produced two years earlier by the same film studio, AIP. While that film shares a concept, and could easily have been a double-feature for this entry, Gas-s-s-s! projects a more post-apocalyptic vibe.

And... huh.

Change of plans, guys. I'm ten minutes in and I have little to no understanding of what's occurring. This is... just a disaster. Uh. Okay. Let's... I don't know. I'll just describe what I'm seeing and we'll put it together later?

We open with an animated sequence in which top military brass accidentally release a deadly gas into the air. They were opening a new facility and tried to crack a bottle of champagne on it, but used a bio-weapon container instead? Some kind of — all these voices are super over-the-top and silly? That's like a bad John Wayne impression, and a Mr. Magoo homage? Credits. But now, there's talking over the credits, where they're joking about dying. The lab's motto is: "To you it may be deadly, but to us, it's really a gas!" Okay. It's going to be that kind of movie.

A hippie is running through the SMU campus, being chased by police officers. Are they harassing him for listening to rock-and-roll? Nope. He's sporting one hell of a crossbow. A giant, all-white crossbow, that he never uses. And this chase sequence just got very Scooby Doo; we're running up and down opposite stairs and the cops trip when they see a pretty girl.

Now the hippie has hidden in a church, where, with the proper robes and a weird Irish voice, he's convinced the cop to join him in the confessional. The framing keeps wanting to make a connection between a long-haired troublemaker and the many images of Jesus, but this potato farmer voice is driving me insane, and I want to know where we've stashed the giant crossbow. A pretty girl is anxiously waiting in the other confessional, and she's the lab assistant slash mistress of a famous scientist and prattles on about chemical exposition while the cop keeps asking for forgiveness. Our lead tells him to teach bicycle safety at the Black Panther rally in Mobile, Alabama.

Our two leads, Coel and Cilla, make out in a car at a drive-in movie theater. I don't know what I'm watching. Where's the crossbow? They compete to make up new, beautiful words for love-making: Turquoise. Manatee. Rainy day. Ferment. Fantasia. Figs. Orgasm. That last one seems a bit of a cheat.

Back into the plot... yay! This gas (or Gas!) (or Gas-s-s-s!) kills anyone over the age of twenty-five by immediately striking them with old age. Kinda cool. Some powerful shots of Americans, suddenly turned elderly, holding their dying loved ones in the streets of Dallas. Younger kids stealing clothes off the backs of the deceased. So that's where we get hipsters...

Our leads bounce around the school, getting opinions from different social groups on how to handle this situation. The stoners want to relax until "the whole world blows over." Young Republicans want to keep everything soldiering onward, and some intellectual reactionary cries out for everyone on both sides to be put to death while simultaneously decrying division. Luckily, the frat quad has the best policy of all: a sex-and-beer party.

The entire soundtrack is written by Country Joe & The Fish, and like Drive, each song describes exactly what we're seeing on screen. Going to predict now that we have more party sequences in the future, with songs that tell us we are watching a party.

Coel and Cilla are in a suburban backyard, while a shirtless Nazi with a whip yells at them. I think this guy has placed himself in charge of giving travel permits, but don't hold me to that, because the completely unsync'd dubbing has given him a high-pitched but also incomprehensible and gravely voice. If Bane ever fought Secret Squirrel... they'd both be annoyed by this.

We're leaving Dallas, and there's a nod to the JFK assassination. And from the book depository... wait. Okay, our leads are in their own car, but some kind of Mystery Wagon van is following them, and they don't seem to notice. Whose hallucination am I in? It's a giant multi-colored vehicle and they're the only other people on the road, trailing right behind them. They see them, right? Roger Corman doesn't care? Fine, then I don't care.

May have been right about that travel permit thing. The car breaks through a line of a dozen guys at a checkpoint, all armed with large automatic weapons, who, I suppose, have no idea how to use them? Coel and Cilla find a deserted town, and burn books from the local library to keep warm, offering a chance to make some jokes about Harold Robbins that have aged very well.

Driving the next day, two guys on horseback with six-shooters get them to pull over. And have just stolen the car and the supplies. Wait. Fifteen hours ago, you drove through a military blockade, and now you can navigate horses and pea-shooters? The lead bandit is named Billy (some people call him The Kid), and he operates a used car dealership. He rides a horse named Pretentious. He rides a horse named Pretentious. He rides a horse named Pretentious. Billy decides he doesn't have to kill Coel and Cilla because they can't dance.

Shoot me in the face.

Coel and Cilla walk to a nearby city where they play kickball with children in the street, then enter a record shop where they encounter pregnant Zooey Deschanel. Cindy Williams? Shirley of Laverne & Shirley is doing incredible work here. She's totally the pre-Zooey, and she is into the indie rock like a mofo. She's also got a black militant boyfriend. That's quirky, right? Coel asks the militant black guy why he's dating a white girl, and he says, "Back off man, we all have inconsistencies! But that doesn't stop the revolution!" Oh, this movie just gets better and— F me, that's a pre–Harold and Maude Bud Cort! Holy crap, that's Talia Shire! ADRIANNNNNNN! I saw Talia Coppola in the credits, forgot to put it together that this was back when even Nic Cage was a Coppola. Also, he was probably five when this movie came out, so he didn't know yet.

Bud Cort and new black friend join Coel to take the car back. Guns in hand, they surround Billy the Kid and his gang — my God. Before each combatant fires, they shout the name of a different Western actor? Tim McCoy! Gabby Hayes! Burt Lancaster! Roy Rogers! Greatest fight sequence of all time. Take note of this, Brett Ratner, you hack. Tonal shift to mourning the looters they've slain — whatthe — OHMIGAWD YES.

You guys. Edgar Allan Poe just drove up on a yellow motorcycle.

A lady behind him, also dressed in Victorian Gothic garb. A raven perched on his shoulder.

Everyone knows who he is.

In the works of H.P. Lovecraft, characters often unwittingly read from some ancient tome and their confused utterances wake the elder gods from out of time and bring about the destruction of existence. Roger Corman, was that your intention with this film? If I hit stop now, do I save the planet? Or just myself, from the creeping madness?

Back on the highway, they keep passing signs telling them the Answers they seek lay with the Oracle. Cannot wait to meet the Oracle. THE VAN IS BACK AND THEN GONE AGAIN. Do we not notice — seriously, you just did a Chinese fire-drill. It's right behind you. Just acknowledge that it exists. For me.

Everyone gathers for a big concert... featuring Country Joe & The Fish. Good. This is good. Now Country Joe is doing some acting? "I'm God's road manager. I'm the God-head. Get it? God? Head?" Bud Cort yells at Cilla until she'll agree to be raped by him. She opts to keep cooking a microwave dinner over an open flame instead, and he storms off. Coel sexes up some random girl (Zoe) in an acid sequence, and they come up with the beautiful word "arrow-feather" to describe love making. Coel meets up with Cilla later and she's happy for him having slept with someone else, even though he won't share his new secret word, like a dick. But his words are echoing in her head the next day, so I guess she's not as cool with this as she's acting? Also, there's a song about "making it with a stranger" so we're just flat telling me —

God Himself speaks to the crowd. To ask whoever was driving a dark blue Mustang convertable to turn off their parking lights. God also sounds like some miserable bastard doing the worst Mel Brooks impression in history.

Crap. What is this? A whole town overrun by a football team? There's a marching band, and the team drives dune buggies with guns attached — THE MYSTERY VAN JUST DROVE THROUGH TOWN AND NO ONE NOTICED. Oh. The team is pillaging the town they run — and they're raping. They're raping everyone. And stealing meat. So meat and rape. It's just like Friday Night Lights, in that way. That's what I'm seeing now.

Our core group stops a rape, but the lead football player throws a flag and penalizes them five yards for being off-sides. Rape prevention isn't worth ten yards? This lead guy — he dresses like Dick Dastardly from Wacky Races, but he looks like Jason Segal. Oscars in '71 overlooked a serious power player. He's leading the team in rape practice, in preparation for their next big raid. And then we watch the instant replay of rape practice, with commentary: "You call that a rape? You'll never score! Do that again!" The cheerleaders agree.

The fuck?

Our leads escape in a wacky dune buggy chase, but the pregnant girl goes into labor, so they track down a doctor. While he tries to help her, with a flasher in trench coat wandering around aimlessly behind them, Cilla gets kidnapped by three dudes. I — No. Stick with me here? They take her to a house where she gleefully takes control of the situation, picking the order she'll be raped: "I'm the rape-ee. I should have something to say. You're first, and then you."

Later, when her friends come to rescue her, she's sitting triumphantly over the three aggressors, whom she has completely worn out via sex, explaining how contemporary women can alter male sexual drives by meeting or exceeding them.

They put up no fight, and reunited with Coel, she shares her philosophy of "If it's going to happen, why not lay back and enjoy it?" Is this... what someone thought empowerment looked like? If so, they immediately undercut it by using a flashback to Coel's sexual encounter, implying that Cilla used her sexual violence victimization as revenge, as she dances about, celebrating.

This isn't as fun as it used to be. Nothing like thirty minutes of "silly rape" to alter your perceptions of a cartoonish film. At least Irreversible knew what it wanted to be...

The group is enslaved by punk rockers who operate a golf course. They escape later, when course rules dictate they cannot be pursued over a water hazard. We're mining the depths of anger-inducing dumb.

Talia Shire explodes while eating anchovies. I don't know. I don't care anymore. I think this happens but it's off-screen and Bud Cort can't explain, so we move on. "It sounded like a bomb. No, it sounded more ironic than that." If something gets raped in the next scene, I'm out.

Almost as bad: the group comes upon a Native American who, I think, tried to do this scene very seriously, and has some decent point to make. But just like the Nazi guy earlier, the actor has been overdubbed by a ridiculous voice that never matches his mouth, and we're just talking about being high and calling the group "round-eyes."

At Pueblo, a peaceful commune has gathered, led by a terrible Jewish stereotype with frizzy hair and glasses. He looks a little like the warden from Superjail. When does that show come back? I would rather be watching — Goddamn, I am annoyed by everything they are saying. Coel is now teaching children, and there's a semi-interesting exchange about pills that would allow you to watch movies on your eye-lids, and how science made it as far as recreating musical films of the 30s, but only in lab mice. I'd rather be listening to Phantogram's Eyelid Movies album. I hate this. I hate myself so much right now. Does Filmpocalyse end here? I just don't give a shit.

Hope! On the horizon! The players of Team Rape are preparing to sack Pueblo. This is tricky. I definitely want to see some hippies get murdered (hooray, I'm cured!) but more than that I don't want to see any more hilarious rape. I have put myself in a stupid place. Let's see what No Win scenario I'm gifted.

Everyone in Pueblo magically puts on Red Cross hats, and the football captain can't go against his military training and attack them. Huh. Okay? Then God sends lightning to blow up a gazeebo and a tunnel opens up and everyone from every other scene in the movie shows up and we all have a party while a song about having a party plays. I hate. I just hate. It oozes from me like — THE MYSTERY VAN. It's here! It's opening up! OHMIGOD I GET RESOLUTION! Who is getting out? Who was hunting our leads for—

It's Abraham Lincoln. It's a big papier-mâché–headed Lincoln. And Gandhi, JFK... Alfred E. Neuman? What. The. Dammit.

Then we have three endings:

Poe is back. "Aren't they all going to rape, lie, fight, and kill, Edgar?" asks his companion, Lenore. "Nevermore," squawks the Raven.

"What do we do now?" inquires Cilla. "Arrow-feather," responds Coel. She smiles, even though she has no idea that "arrow-feather" is his secret work with the other girl he screwed. Wasn't she mad about that? Isn't that why she had such a good time being — nope.

Finally, over the credits:

God: Hey Jesus, shall we fire up the gold chariot and finish this off?
Jesus: Sure, pop. Why don't you go first this time?
God: You should live so long!

What does this movie have to say about the Apocalypse? Kids are idiots. I hate the Seventies. Country Joe had a terrible band. Whatever. No message this round. Maybe some kind of meta-message about wasting your life, but I don't feel I should put any more effort into this film. Bail.

The entire seventy-seven minute experience is on Youtube. Wow. What a gift to you. Enjoy.

Brock Wilbur's FILMPOCALYPSE is a thing he does every Wednesday through 2012. Check out more of him at BrockWilbur.com or by following on Twitter @BrockWilbur.

You know those times where you just stumble upon a show and then just compulsory watch every single one like a complete addict then watch your favorite ones over again just because. JonTron's show has been that for the past week. If you've read past Web Wednesdays, you know I'm all about the delivery. Most these shows can run together: find game, make jokes about game, post, ????, profit(?). However, JonTron throws basically all that to the wind with his off kilter delivery. Basically, you know every pretty standard rule about game reviewing for entertainment. Yeah. Go ahead and forget those. You won't need them here.

Like a lot of reviewers, JonTron tends to tackle some of the worst games ever to appear, with his specialty seeming to be the SNES. However, the games he chooses...oh boy the games. For example, the most recent episode just happens to be Home Improvement: The SNES Game. Yes. There was a Home Improvement video game. Where you fight dinosaurs. Don't believe me? Watch:

As you can notice, his performance and writing is a little...out there. Which is right up my alley. Personally, with his voice and inflection, it almost reminds me of Nathan Lane at his most frantic of moments, which can be downright hysterical. Especally when put out on another one of those games that's considered the worst ever made Aquaman: Battle for Atlantis:

He doesn't just take on Nintendo games...ok just primarally Nintendo games. But how about racing hedgehogs on the Sega Saturn? Yep...Sonic R anyone? Oh, and I totally believe this take on Sonic Team. Totally.

As we're in furry land, what about argueably one of the biggest dissapointments of the GameCube era, Stairfax Temperatures...or Starfox Adventures:

JonTron can be found on NormalBoots.com and on his YouTube account. You can connect to him on his Twitter and/or Facebook. And Cybirds are cool.

It has been brought to my attention that this is real. This is a thing that's happening. The absolute ridiculousness of this is far outweighed by the total amount of awesomeness. If you were to get an old-timey scale, and put the ridiculous on one side, and the awesome on the other, the awesome would be touching the ground. It's true, I already tried it.

So, get ready, folks. Your previous views and ideas of our former president are about to be shot in the face, or should I say, stabbed in the heart. (yeah, I went there)

When I moved to Los Angeles, the hills were alive with the sound of inferno.

Forest fires raged, and consumed subdivisions whole. Smoke covered the smog that covered the city, and on several occasions, my friends from the Valley evacuated and crashed with me. Darkness never blotted out our sky, but if the wind hit just right, you could smell the embers. One morning my car was covered in soot — a surreal image I'll never shake.

In an op-ed piece which ran at the time, a coastal contrast was highlighted. New Yorkers had to deal with 9/11, taxi drivers, extreme weather, and other New Yorkers on public transit. Los Angeles was jealous of this threatening lifestyle, but overcompensated. Our people proved we could hang by fully embracing the Apocalypse, in whatever form it took that week. Californians never ran from their own burning homes, but stood out front in sunglasses, gin and tonic in hand, smiling and humming "Light My Fire" as the flames took control.

What the op-ed writer drew attention to was a city-wide inferiority complex, but the image remains cool because it personifies exactly that: an acceptance of that which we cannot change, and the mildest of revelry in the face of doom. Maybe LA refused to accept the emotional undercurrents of the moment, but at least that one homeowner opted for a sense of humor over pitiful rebuke.

Directed by a pre–Inherit the Wind Stanley Kramer, On The Beach (1959) broached the subject of nuclear Armageddon with nary a degree of hope. resigned to the unbeatable of the inevitable. The same gin would fill our glass, we'd hum a different song, but we'd also been the ones burning.

In the future (1964), the United States' nuclear submarine Sawfish surfaces outside Melbourne. World War III has come and gone, and so has the entirety of the northern hemisphere. Australia, posing no threat to any of the major powers, was mercifully overlooked, and the American sub was trapped in the Pacific during the global bombardment. Commander Dwight Lionel Towers (Gregory Peck) leads his men to shore, hoping the last earthly government will benefit from their aide.

While the nuclear blasts wiped out life across the globe, Australian scientists fear they'll fare no better; wind patterns will sweep the radioactive fallout into the southern hemisphere within five months. There are a few hypothetical safe-points that only the Sawfish can reach, but the population has already begrudgingly accepted their fate.

Here lies the genius of On The Beach: an entire country of survivors — who had nothing to do with the war — damned to a horrific fate, but "gifted" an extra half-year for their troubles. How society crumbles is not the focus, but rather how long it may survive past the point of necessity.

Local lieutenant Peter Holmes (Anthony Perkins) is assigned to take the American Commander into his care for a weekend of shore leave, before embarking with their crew to explore possible nuclear safe-zones on other continents. Holmes is nervous about accepting a position that may keep him at sea past the point of Australia's expiration, as he wants to be home with his newlywed wife and their child for the final moments. Seeing Psycho's Norman Bates as a romantic lead is just as unsettling as any theme within the film.

Cmdr. Towers witnesses the various reactions to the incoming airborne toxic event while having one hell of a blow-out at Holmes' house party. Since there is no definitive explanation of what brought about the third world war, the men of the party dedicate themselves to unearthing a cause, and assigning the blame. The power mad actions of a select few? Simple mechanical error? Trigger-happy defense commanders? The details no longer matter, but the painful truth remains: "Who would ever have believed that human beings would be stupid enough to blow themselves off the face of the Earth?"

Holmes' wife, who refuses to accept the futility of the situation, breaks down. Scientist Julian Osborne (Fred Astaire) drunkenly buries the room in despair, as he berates his own involvement in weapon's development. His lush of a lab partner, Moira (Ava Gardner), falls hard for Towers, ignoring that the captain has rejected reality: opting instead for a fantasy world where his wife is still waiting at home for him, and his children will attend the colleges he always imagined.

The film is long, literary, and jarringly inconsistent between bleak pain and comedic release — distracting moviemaking, but unabashedly honest. No party ever ends on a high note; no dark evaluation of humanity's chances slips past without a few clunky one-liners. These jokes may rarely land, but how funny are the harbingers of destruction expected to be?

Character arcs serve their purpose, and the cinematography employs fascinating use of sudden adjustment to canted-angles. The best parts of On The Beach is an odd assortment of memorable scenes, beginning with the small moment of removing nuclear warheads (a now-laughable anachronism) from the sub.

The Sawfish's expedition searches Alaska and the United States coastline for safe-zones, and turns up empty. A mysterious Morse Code signal which had provided so much hope is revealed to be a cruel cosmic prank. Crew member Swain bails near his home of San Francisco, choosing the quick brutality at home over the slow fade to black waiting in Australia. Towers watches him die, respecting his decision, and communicating via periscope in a sequence that looks hilariously oddball, but contains more heart than any other conversation in the film.

Back at home, elder curmudgeons in the local pub complain about the excess remaining Port, and the poor planning on the part of the producers to leave more than they can possibly drink by the Apocalypse. Holmes procures government-issued suicide pills to ease the pain of his wife and child. A geriatric server outlives all his pub regulars, but still keeps the place in order. Fred Astaire's dedicated yet devastated scientist procures the finest race-car in the country, and enters himself in the Grand Prix, because why not? Towers and Moira pursue a love that cannot be, and then one day, humanity is dead. The final shot pulls out from a church gathering square, now abandoned, overseen by the banner "This Is Still Time... Brother," a message no longer applicable to this world.

They say that the best science-fiction does not merely predict the future, but prevents it. Kramer's intention was clear, and for the time, successful. Without a single mushroom cloud leaves the film open to all future interpretations for comparable endgame sequences. More than fifty years later, On The Beach resonates with the same harsh reminders: when the end comes, it will come for us all, but the choice will not be made by you.

Brock Wilbur's FILMPOCALYPSE is a thing he does every Wednesday through 2012. Check out more of him at BrockWilbur.com or by following on Twitter @BrockWilbur.

Mmmm, I sure hope those pizza-shaped marshmallows taste as good as they look!

I don't know how I'm suppose to follow-up Lisa's post from yesterday with some crappy Friday Round-Up, but here we go.

In relation to the opening picture. CEREAL IS AWESOME! I LOVE CEREAL! One thing that makes me sad about cereal nowadays is the fact that they never put good prizes in them anymore. What the heck?!? I remember when you could buy a box of cereal, and get a full-sized Ninja Turtle as a prize inside! (that previous statement may be slightly exaggerated for emphasis) /mini-rant Cereal boxes have changed their marketing over the years to appeal to a different generation of kids. Here are 15 examples of how cereal boxes have changed over time. [buzzfeed]

We've become very familiar with how some of the biggest websites look. Usually they're clean and stream-lined and can go 0-60 in under 5 seconds. Unless you're on dial-up, in which case, I pity you. Let us take a quick trip back in time to see how websites such as Google and Youtube looked like when they first launched, shall we? [mashable]

This right here will be the only thing I post, related to Single's Awareness Day. I will spare you all from a Nick Rant about how ridiculous I think this day is. So yeah... here are 35 geeky Valentine's Day cards. [gammasquad]

MOVING ON!

Apparently the Super Bowl Half Time Show was a secret ode to Skyrim

Looking back to last Sunday and the Super Bowl halftime show. SRSLY?? C'mon... SRSLY? When will the people in charge of finding these performers realize that they are making horrible choices. The only person not lip syncing was Cee Lo. Who actually thought that having Madonna do the HT show was a good idea? UGH! /mini rant. There are only a couple halftime shows that I consider to be awesome. SB XXXVII with No Doubt, and SB XXVII with Michael Jackson. SB XXXV with Aerosmith wasn't too bad either. I got to thinking who would be an amazing person to play the halftime show? Strangely enough I then found this article. BRILLIANT! Why Weird Al should play the Super Bowl. [gammasquad]

Back to the Future. One of the best trilogy's to ever grace the silver screen, but what about the stage? There's a possibility of BTTF becoming a stage musical. [blastr]

With the sponsorship of Red Bull, a man attempts to break the sound barrier without any vehicle, only his body, by jumping from a height of 22 miles. It makes all the sense in the world! Let's do a skydive, in a space suit, from just under the ozone layer so as to not burst into flames, and try to break the sound barrier with my body, because, hey, SCREW YOU TERMINAL VELOCITY! [geekologie]

What happens when two of the best video games from completely different time periods collide? A MASS EXPLOSION OF AWESOME! Skyrim, meet Portal 2. Portal 2, Skyrim. That's right folks, not only did Skyrim officially release their mod tools with a bonus Portal 2 mod, BUT hidden within these releases are hints to either a Portal 2 related quest, or a future Portal 2 related quest. Seriously, my brain can't handle this. [geekosystem]

This kid decided to say "Screw you!" to his DNA encoded fear of falling. Then he decides to do parkour from the edge of the roof of a 20 story building, and the arm of a massive crane. My legs were shaking just watching this guy. You know... that feeling you get in your legs when you get too close to the edge of a high place? Yeah, that feeling. [dailywhat]

Here are 25 animals who think they're people. [buzzfeed]

There are very few shows that can literally make me laugh out loud during nearly every episode. Even fewer that make me laugh so hard I can't breathe. A few examples are Home Improvement, Psych, Friends, The Big Bang Theory, and the newest addition, New Girl. New Girl has made me laugh more in just the last 2 episodes, than I have at any show in a long time. As of 2 weeks ago, New Girl had one of the funniest scenes I've ever seen from  any show ever in the history of television. If you disagree, your argument will be marked as invalid on the basis of "your sense of humor is broken, and may God have mercy on your soul." Here is the scene I speak of. I warn you now to put down any food or drink you may be consuming at the moment. [youtube]

My my, Batman, you're looking quite dapper this evening.